Picnic Table Sex

Jonny · 04-01-2008, 05:51 PM

FOXNews.com - Man Faces Charges for Having Sex With Picnic Table - Local News | News Articles | National News | US News

No this isnt an april fools article..

Soulforged · 04-01-2008, 06:20 PM

FOX19.com and FOX19 News, weather, traffic, and sports for Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky | Ohio man facing charges for having sex with a picnic table

expanded article

Liviya · 04-01-2008, 08:26 PM

oh my god, im gonna pee my pants over here. that is fucking hilarious.

Talonis · 04-01-2008, 08:53 PM

Execute this sicko now plz. I mean, seriously....w t f

Soulforged · 04-01-2008, 09:07 PM

What happens if the picnic table is used as a "prop" in sex? IE: there's another person underneath it, instead of just fucking with the table alone.

Felkroth · 04-02-2008, 03:09 AM

I'll be honest, Im not big enough for my patio furniture, unbrella hole, do-hickey. thats a goddamn big hole!

Nardaak · 04-02-2008, 03:34 AM

haha this was linked last night at work, funny read

Fisstafury · 04-02-2008, 09:15 AM

first of all, how can ANYONE maintain an erection when they put their junk to cold metal?

second of all, this guy was reported to have a wife and two kids... arent you supposed to swear off of doing shit like this once youve decided to breed? I'd feel weird about rubbing one out or even banging my wife if i had kids in the house. regardless of whether they were even home at the time or not.

i couldnt drink enough delicious Aha Toro Tequila to ever really want to fuck my furniture. think he'll ever have a guest sit on the couch again? :P

Talonis · 04-02-2008, 10:01 AM

How horrible must his wife's vagina be if he prefers the umbrella hole in the table to it?

IMO, the wife should be arrested. Any dude that has to resort to humping the table instead of his wife's pussy is victim of criminal ass denial.

Ninibi · 04-02-2008, 03:14 PM

Good thing he wasn't attracted to the grill.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Talonis

How horrible must his wife's vagina be if he prefers the umbrella hole in the table to it?

IMO, the wife should be arrested. Any dude that has to resort to humping the table instead of his wife's pussy is victim of criminal ass denial.

So you're saying if you don't get some from the lil misses in a timely manner, someone may find you sexing up the patio furniture?

I also like how the one lady says gee I hope the kids don't find out about it. It was just plastered on the evening news along with a map to their house... LOL Naw, they'll never know!