The confession thread!

Dblock · 10-08-2008, 05:59 AM

LOL. Ever commit a crime or the like and get away with it? Anything? Stealing gum, beatings, robbery, drugs? Wanna get it off your chest? Here ya go lol.

One time my friends and I were gallavanting around my town. We rolled up on this kids van who ratted out one of our leet party spots in the woods because someone took his keg cup away. Anyhow ironically the van was parked in the fucking back of a bank parking lot and for some reason or another we parked right next to it to burn one down. Upon reckoning whos van it was we formed a raid. We had a few hockey sticks and random things in the car we were in (we all played hockey at the time) and thrashed this van horribly. Kids were like gorillas/ the guy in terminator trying to bash through the top and hood of this beast. When we were done we found out the next day it was actually not the kids van and was ironically one of our good friends moms. He never knew offically but one day when i was plastered about 8 years later I kinda let it on to him. I blame caravan in the 1990's for selling to many of the green ones.

-Dblock

Avaela · 10-08-2008, 06:02 AM

i downloaded some kiddy porn on kazaa or some shit when i was 15

Morara · 10-08-2008, 06:34 AM

I planned and organized 9/11.

Morara · 10-08-2008, 06:34 AM

Oh shit, I mean I own a 7-11.

Avaela · 10-08-2008, 06:35 AM

same difference

Gori · 10-08-2008, 10:01 AM

Too much shit to confess in detail, Let's just say I was a bad boy who was fortunate enough to 1) not get caught on the really bad shit 2) grow up. The same can't be said for many of my childhood friends.

There is one shoplifitng incident that I have no idea how I got away with. I had on my school jacket, you know, the wool kind with leather sleeves, and had it partially buttoned up. I had slipped a box of cologne into my waist band and covered it with my shirt then with my jacket. A security guard came up to me and took me back to the office accusing me of stealing. He asked me to empty my pockets and shit, but never did check my waist band. Lucky for me I guess that I was a skinny punk back then. Sad thing, even after getting cut loose that didn't deter me from further things. Too bad, as that wasn't too long into my foray with lawlessness.

Oizen · 10-08-2008, 01:16 PM

It's over a decade ago now but, at about 4 in the morning I was out for a stroll in a bad part of town and I came across a pepsi truck. And to my astonishment it was unlocked... all of it. Well I promptly hoofed home and borrowed a buddy's beater and came back to fill the backseat and trunk to the brim with 12 packs of pepsi, mountain dew, & dr. pepper then unloaded my loot into the garage. After further inspection I determined the garage still had room to spare so, I went back for a second round... and then a third... on the sixth haul the sun was coming up and I'd pretty much cleaned the truck dry while filling half of our garage with scrumptious doom & wolfenstein winning fuel.
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Now I'd actually been out all night partying because of my roommate's b-day the next day... and he happened to be an obsessed Dr. Pepper consumer (like always has one in his hand with a stog). My new soda fortune gave me a brilliant idea for a present.

So swiftly, using my new found 12 pack schlepping muscles, I filled the enter hallway for around ten feet, covering his room door (wall to wall and floor to ceiling) with cases of Dr. Pepper. (...about a hundred and or so) and on the wall of soda facing his door I left a loving note that read "HAPPY BIRTHDAY BITCH".

Let's just say I was beaming with pride when I woke up and heard his hostile jubilation of appreciation of my generous gift muffeled through the mountain of cans while he crawled out his bedroom window to take a ritualistic morning beer-piss in the yard after abandoning his effort to escape traditionally to the bathroom across the hall from his bedroom and then foiled again from the hallway.

Cracking a case with cock in hand and a Dr. Pepper in the other, he cussed me from the front yard... and I laughed...

The entire house didn't buy a soda for about a year.

I'm glad I finally got that off my chest.

Addee · 10-08-2008, 01:28 PM

Finally? I wonder how much shit the driver of that truck got? Besides losing his job...

I shoplifted once, got caught, it was lame ass shit too. I've in my younger years driven drunk more than I'd like to admit. Got pulled over nearly smashed and let go. That shit doesn't happen anymore. I have a girlfriend that has more DUI's than I have fingers, is younger than me, and will NEVER have her drivers license in the state of Alaska. Other than stupid kid stuff in high school, I've not done anything terrible. Hmmm....maybe it's time to start living.

P.s. LOL at Gori's Title. /giggle

Oizen · 10-08-2008, 01:42 PM

yea Finally...

...it's been been my tell-tale heart for many years. Every time I see someone slug a can of soda I have to say a rosary and flog my psyche for being an evil & despicable thief. Thankfully, in my confession I am redeemed of that sin because Jesus loves me.

Addee · 10-08-2008, 01:45 PM

Good thing, everyone else thinks you're an asshole