Winterstar

Get yourself in that position, with the legally mandated waiting periods, and then tell me that.

Idealism like that is great in theory, but in reality...not so much.

Will

That's not idealism. Ask a divorce lawyer if you don't believe me.

Winterstar

First off, we're talking the social implications, not legal, so that argument is off-point.

And if it WAS on point...With most states going to no-fault divorce and the blue laws rarely being enforced (and may be unconstitutional based on Lawrence v. Texas), the argument is moot.

But I'll take your advice. I'm sure there's at least one divorce lawyer in my graduating class from Law School. ;-)

Kelenvor

Enstrangement in marriage is unfortunately a common thing and not a product of modern times. It's also a tricky issue. Many spouses can justify to themselve sex with another if their marriage has entered this state.

None of us here know all the details nor do I think either parties will reveal all the details. She seems really young which isn't an excuse but explains her desire for personal freedom in the circumstances.

The moral of the story here is not to let marriage problems simmer. It only leads to drama that no one needs in their short lives here on earth. Work it out. Now not later. If it can't be worked out then move on. Don't play a games, in the end, no one really wins and you leave a lot of hurt people. (Yes, I've been married almost 10 years so I know all about working out marriage problems)

Qayr

I don't disagree with you, however, this quote was kind of taken out of context. Hubbe was not one of the ones saying that Jen was abused... he was responding to Sarhea's generalizations that women that are in abusive relationships are there because they either want to be or think they deserve it. In which case, Hubbe was 100% correct in his post.

Will

You're right, the value of marriage vows is what the parties place on them. If both parties agree they're null and void, then that's the end and the paperwork is just a formality. But I'd rather be safe than sorry in case my soon-to-be-ex- turns out to be less understanding than yours.

As for Lawrence v. Texas, you're saying adultery is an unconstitutional moral judgement? That'd be an interesting argument. I can't see it working right now, but interracial marriage used to be illegal too. Maybe one day society will decide marital fidelity is an unreasonable restriction of our rights, but then what will marriage be other than a tax break?

Senelin

Maybe that's all it should be. Certainly would simplify things.

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Leithe

Yeah, I heard someone say once that "marriage" and "formal legal unions" should be seperated, legally. Good idea imo.

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shard grind shard grind shard grind then die raiding 9000x tbh

HaloChaos

Marriage is a religious term, and it belongs in religion.
Formal Legal Unions is a better term for something Governments can give, and they do actually. Civil Unions. "Marriage Certs" etc.

But it doesn't apply here. Me and her were married in a religous christian church which has your standard christian values.

Leithe

Yar, I figured. Therefore pwnering of the 9th degree is (was?) in order.

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shard grind shard grind shard grind then die raiding 9000x tbh