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  1. #31
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    Quote Originally Posted by Vinyard View Post
    Stop that



    I lol'd

  2. #32
    Finnaly Betrayed
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    Quote Originally Posted by Vinyard View Post
    Stop that



    lololololololol
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  3. #33
    Lush airee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    I never played horsie. But the parents had oneof those old massagers crab was talking about. That thing rocked. And i totally found my dads stash of sexy stories printed out on a dot matrix printer in a binder somewhere.

  4. #34
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?


  5. #35
    Senior Member Jezes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    You beat me to it, I was just about to post that
    To know the face of God is to know madness.



    Quote Originally Posted by Buffrat View Post
    Except Jezes is actually good at EQ2.

  6. #36
    I stand with Rand Hoss's Avatar
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    Quote Originally Posted by Laodaron View Post
    I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that toys in my panties is at least equal to horsie on my uncles knee.
    no not equal because that wouldn't be hot to me. If my niece posted here, I think that might be her story.

    So it'd be creepy. No more horsie after that.
    It's only weird if it doesn't work.

  7. #37
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    Quote Originally Posted by Topan View Post
    Me and my neighbour who is the same as as I were going to the park to play some basketball. While we were walking there, he wanted to tell me a secret he has been hiding for years ... he wanted me to be the first to know.

    I said, "Yeah, that's cool; go ahead and tell me."

    He told me he was gay! At that age, I was immature and hated gay people and all that. I'm not gay but, like most guys, you fantasize about stuff like that

    I told him, "That's ok with me but please don't make a move on me."

    He laughed and said he was telling me he was gay and liked men; he didn't like me.




    Bravo sir--I am impressed.
    I was OK then. We played some basketball, but the whole time what he told me was on my mind. I told him I had to go home, but he said nobody was at his house so we could order some food and chill out for a few hours.

    So I went there and started using his computer to check my email, and then he started showing me all these gay sites he had on his computer. Then he asked if I wanted to see his cock. I said no, but i really wanted to see it. I told him to save that for his gay lover.

    After a while of looking at more pictures, he said are you suuuure.

    Then I said, "OK, show me." He popped out his boner and asked if he could see mine. I was kind of getting excited, so I pulled mine out after I made him swear not to tell anyone.

    Then he asked to touch it. He grabbed it and started stroking it. I came in about 10 seconds, and he was shocked. He said, "Wow, are you sure you aren't gay?"

    I said, "Yes, I'm sure!" Then I zipped up and told him I had to go home.



    Bravo sir-I am impressed.
    Liberal Women are Fugly.

  8. #38
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    I'm sad that he edited the last part out before anyone could quote it.

  9. #39
    Cavalier Puppeteer Mordenkainaen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    Dry-humping a teddy bear --> vibrating Playstation controller --> long hot showers.

    =D

    Edit: I don't remember how old I was when I discovered porn, but I'm sure it was a great year.
    Quote Originally Posted by Deson View Post
    Just remember, lawyers are always trying to fuck you. In this case it may be literally.
    Quote Originally Posted by Frezzy358 View Post
    but it looks like I was ok with the whole thing as long as I got to hold my bunny and pick flowers.

  10. #40
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    Default Re: Who taught you to masturbate?

    My Grandpa taught me.

    I'd spend the Summer with him doing chores around his farm and every evening he would pay me in quarters.

    A roll of quarters-$10-and in the 70's that was a lot of money for a kid.

    He used to sit outside in his wicker chair every evening in just his underwear after the work was completed, and after he called me over he would break open the roll of quarters into his briefs. I could usually find about $9.50-not sure where that one or two lost quarter/s went too.

    I miss that old man.
    Liberal Women are Fugly.

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